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The Best Holiday Gift Imaginable: A Big Book of Amusements

Need the absolute perfect holiday gift? We’ve made it for you!

Look, I don’t like to plug things. Current Affairs has no outside advertising, we’re 100 percent supported by subscriptions and donations. But sometimes we’ve just got to tell you about a cool thing that we’re selling!

The Current Affairs Big Book of Amusements is an incredible thing to behold. It’s a giant, full-color parody of a children’s activity book, edited by Current Affairs Managing & Amusements Editor Lyta Gold and myself. We’re very proud of it. It’s packed with games, comics, lists, diagrams, and so much more. If Vladimir Lenin became the editor of Highlights for Children (and developed a sense of humor), he might have produced the Big Book of Amusements.

As you can see on the beautiful cover (designed by Jon White), the Book of Amusements contains all kinds of how-tos for rebellious leftist children. For instance, you’ll get a list of pranks to place on the ICE agents in your town:

But the Big Book of Amusements is also educational! For instance, you’ll get to play the illuminating game of geopolitics, “Match The U.S. Crimes To The Countries They Were Committed Against”:

We’ve got quizzes, like “Which Dystopia Have I Found Myself In?,” “Could You Be A New York Times Columnist?,” and “Is My Feminism Angry Enough?.” There are full board games, too. For instance, there’s a fully-playable “CLUE: Dead Billionaire Edition,” in which you’ll have to match the dead billionaire to the reason they deserved their fate. There’s an entire board game called “Can You Pay Off Your Student Debt?” And, of course, there’s “Socialist Monopoly”:

It’s not all games, though. The Book of Amusements includes lots of quantitative and informative Lists, such as:

  • List of Socialist Animals And The Reasons Each Animal Is Socialist
  • List of Failson Fashions
  • DIY Guide To Solving Climate Change At Home Using Simple Materials Available Around The House
  • List of Fresh Hot Takes On Gender Politics
  • The Best Sex Positions For Conceiving An Employable Child
  • List of All The Bad Opinions

You’ll learn something about almost everything! There’s a flowchart on how to troll the alt-right, and another on how to stop a dragon attack. You’ll be given a guided tour of the 21st-century college campus and meet a friendly fellow called “Leo the Libertarian Lion.” There’s a cut-out fortune teller, an entire illustration of the socialist utopia, a comic about how insufferable David Frum is, and a panorama of Hell and all the people who deserve to burn in it:

Do you want things to cut out and play with? Of course you do! How about paper dolls of British Labour Party Leader Jeremy Corbyn in all his various outfits:

Wow! Do you want a comic about Steven Pinker? We’ve got it!

Do you want to see a squid practicing law? That’s in the book. Do you want a parody of Bari Weiss about cannibalistic aliens? You bet it’s there. Do you want “spider moms”? We’ve got ’em. Do you want to see what social media will look like under socialism? This book will show you. Do you want to see a dystopian university campus? We’ll take you there. Do you want to know something unsettling about Ron Paul? We’re gonna tell you. Do you want to see inside a bird cafe? We’ve got an exclusive image. Do you want 50 ways to start an argument? This book lists them. Do you want flamingos? Robots? Flowers? They’re all in there, and so, so much more.

The whole thing is illustrated by the extraordinary team of Current Affairs artists. It’s smart, hilarious, and visually stunning! And even better, when you buy it, you’re supporting independent left media and allowing us to create more extraordinary Amusements in the future. There has never been a book like this, ever, and anyone you give it to will not soon forget that you gave it to them.

Okay, I’m sure you’re ready to buy the Current Affairs Big Book of Amusements. So go to our store or, if you must, to Amazon (don’t worry, we’ll nationalize it soon), and load up on copies for everyone you love! (For those you don’t love, give copies of Nathan J. Robinson’s Why You Should Be A Socialist.)

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